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What To Do When You Hit a Brick Wall in Life6 min read

   by [16]Dan | Feb 10, 2020 | [17]Philosophy and Mindset | [18]0 comments
   What To Do When You Hit a Brick Wall in Life6 min read

   Life is full obstacles. Big and small. Permanent and temporary. Serious
   and trivial. If you live any sort of a long and decent lifetime, you
   are going to experience plenty of all of these. A simple search online
   will [19]reveal some of the toughest challenges that people you may
   know have faced.

   These obstacles aren’t something to fear or bemoan though, they’re
   something to celebrate. The struggles we face and the obstacles we
   overcome often end up defining who we are. Sometimes though, that
   doesn’t make them any easier to deal with at the time. And brick walls
   aren’t exactly ideal, no matter when you experience them.

   Obstacles, struggles and hitting brick walls are all inevitable in your
   lifetime. Whether you are facing one now, helping someone facing one
   now or preparing for one in the future, this article will help you
   decide what to do when you hit a brick wall in life.


Identify the brick wall


   One of the first things that you need to when you hit a brick wall in
   your life is to identify exactly what the wall is. This is often easier
   said than done though because the metaphorical walls that we hit are
   often professional shape-shifters.

   They make you think that you have a chocolate obsession, when the real
   wall is a habit of [20]procrastination.

   They make you think that your short arms are stopping you from being
   good at pull-ups, when the real wall is your willpower in the moment.

   It’s important to identify your wall for what it really is. There is
   often only one or two major things that are holding you back, and all
   of the other symptoms stem from those. Is it your routine? Is it your
   work? Is it yourself? Is the [21]wall even real? Or is it just a bad
   week/month? The brick wall isn’t always what it seems and it may not
   even stick around for that long, so it’s important to know what you are
   dealing with before you get too stressed out.


Evaluate the brick wall


   Once you have a decent idea about what the roadblock you are facing is,
   it’s time to decide how you are going to deal with it.

   Is the wall surmountable? Or is it eighty-feet high?

   If it’s surmountable, say you realise that the wall is your
   self-confidence or your inability to kick with your left foot, then all
   you need to do is start building a ladder over the top. Practice
   speaking in front of the mirror and then in front of people. Spend
   extra time practising with your left foot until it is at a level that
   you are happy with.

   If the wall is eighty-feet high, say there isn’t another worthwhile
   promotion opportunity at your work without it meaning much more
   responsibility and only a small pay rise, is there an alternate route
   you can take? Either around the wall or a new path entirely?


Practice Resilience


   Resilience is an interesting word because it is made up of many more
   parts than people initially think.

   Sometimes, resilience means having faith in what you are doing. It is
   when you have confidence in your methods, your process, your habits and
   you just weather the storm that will inevitably come – like a strong
   ship made for handling the harshness of the seas. It is where time and
   repetition are the key factors in getting where you want to go.
   Resilience and patience often go hand-in-hand and this is the classical
   sense of the word.

   The other, lesser-known side to resilience is the ability to step back
   and re-evaluate your situation. It is taking another look at your
   methods, your process and your [22]habits and deciding whether they are
   building you up to ride and survive ferocious waters or if they are
   building you something feeble to travel in.

   Stepping away from the metaphors, resilience is knowing when to push
   through and also knowing when to reflect, adjust and pivot. In order to
   overcome any set of obstacles in your life, it is important to know
   when to use both. If you don’t know yet, you just have to keep
   practising until you do.


Recognise that brick walls aren’t unique to you


   It may not come as a surprise to you when written down as bluntly and
   as obvious as this, but that is usually what we need. Personally, when
   I get wrapped up in a problem, hit a big obstacle or suffer in any way
   in my own life, I often slip into the mindset of thinking that the
   problem is unique to me. This envokes a sense of self-pity – which
   doesn’t help anyone – rather than a plan of action.

   It’s really important to realise that everyone hits brick walls in
   every area of life: health, career, finance, relationships, you name
   it. The fact of the matter is that nobody knows what they are
   doing all of the time and for most of us including myself, we have no
   idea what we are doing most of the time, either. You need to let your
   [23]impostor syndrome step to one side for a little while.

   That’s just the way life goes. You can either sit at the foot of the
   wall in pity or start trying method after method for finding a way to
   get past it. I don’t know anyone who has gotten past a wall with the
   first method.


Speak to people you trust


   This is perhaps the most important point in this list. As well as
   speaking to people you trust such as close friends or family, you can
   try taking advice from [24]mentors that you’ve never met but who you
   know give good advice. In essence, get a different perspective on the
   big obstacle standing in your way that isn’t involved with the
   obstacle.

   By nature, our walls are personal and unique to us. We can become
   attached to them, loathe them and see them as either enemies that we
   can never conquer or convenient stopping points so we don’t need to
   push ourselves further. Whatever role the wall is playing in your life,
   it is useful to get an outsider’s perspective – someone who isn’t
   wrapped up with the obstacle like you might be.

   This is why it is easy to give great advice to your friends but why it
   is so [25]hard to take your own advice. It’s easy to assess the
   situation in a non-emotional manner when we aren’t involved and choose
   the right plan of action – even when it isn’t the easiest plan of
   action. When it’s you, you get all of the same mental barriers that
   your friend has. That’s why in order to get over your brick wall in
   life, it is useful to get advice from people who aren’t facing it
   themselves (and ideally, have faced something similar in the past and
   won).

   The wall that you are facing in your life might be extremely specific
   or very vague. Either way, these principles are designed to be applied
   to whatever obstacle that you face.


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